We have 2 dogs.
Yesterday we spent the day in the yard cleaning up poop. The snow is finally melted or melting and well two big dogs and winter creates a terrible situation. Last year we paid a group of kids to come a clean for a couple of hours and it was great. This year Covid-19 put a wrench in that plan among so many others. So yesterday we found ourselves filling bad after bag after bag with poop. We got done about 1/3 of the yard and of course our lovely, loyal pets left us new gifts to clean up this morning. Now you may wonder what a post about poop in my yard and faith have to do with one another? Well nothing really but it is something else that I noticed that got me thinking.
A blade of green grass.
As we raked and shovelled I noticed pushing through all the old dead grass and piles of poop was green grass. It it funny how much it caused me to pause and also how much joy it brought me. I am not a people person in the sense of wanting to spend time with others socially. Small groups only so the idea of Social Distancing/Physical distancing in this current time was one I took in stride. What I didn't take into account was the fact that I can't be around other people now. It is different when the choice has been removed. It is harder.
I think about my students, who are separated from their peers, who are missing the structures of school, the opportunities to socialize. I think about the anxiety I feel about possibly getting sick and can't imagine how they might be feeling with even less control. It just seems like there is not an end in sight. And then there was that miraculous blade of grass.
The image of it pushing through. I am not sure why it struck me so much but as we walked on our daily, "get the heck out of the house and walk the trails" walk I could not shake it. I get the symbolism of spring and the whole idea of rebirth but it is hard to imagine things getting better right now. But it isn't impossible. The grass taught me that.
I need to have faith in my ability as a teacher and this combination of class cancellation and trying to help my students through online leaning comes to a collision with my imposter syndrome that is not going anywhere any time soon. I need to have faith that this too shall pass. I need to have faith in my students (this is not difficult, they are the best) that they will be able to tackle this new challenge with me. That we will be able to extend GRACE to each other as we learn together.
I need to have faith.
Two weeks ago this whole situation looked like my yard after the snow melted. A lot of CRAP. As we start week three I feel like the yard is looking better. Work my students started posting, ideas they are building on are exciting to see. Sure we have a lot of challenges ahead but I have faith that more grass will pop up. More blue sky days are on the way. As we learn to walk on this new journey we will overcome the challenges. Because we are excellent.
I have faith.
Now if I have any parents of students that read this blog please do me a favour. Give yourselves some GRACE. No one knows what "right" looks like in this new normal but I know without a doubt you are giving this your best. Some days will be better than others. Just like they are in the classroom, some days the kids will need a break and some days you will. Take the breaks. They are important.